My desire is to put the often unspoken darkness of mental illnesses to words, and in doing so, to provide a sense of hope for the fighter and a glimpse into the painful reality of a friend, spouse, or family member that can be hard to understand. As a fighter, I can honestly say that it can feel impossible to express what I’m feeling, how much more confusing for the ones who walk through life by my side.
In the previous post, I shared five of my own tips that have brought me emotional health. Today’s post is a view from the other side. I couldn’t have asked anyone better than the one who’s held my hand through this four-year journey towards emotional health – my husband.
These 5 tips are Lucas’ own realizations and discoveries, directly from his heart to yours!
1. Be patient.
The treatment of depression and a mental illness is long-term with a lot of ups and downs. It takes patience to deal with it through the years. As long as your loved one is getting help, the best thing for you to do is wait.
2. Get help.
As it takes professional help for the person going through the emotional illness to get better, so it will take professional help for you to learn how to deal with it. Therapy isn't just for the sick, but also for the ones who are dealing with someone who is.
3. Don’t rationalize.
Telling the person to be happy won't make them so anymore than telling someone with the flu to get better. Depression is not black and white.
4. Don't blame yourself.
Most of the time; depression or mental illnesses have roots to the person’s childhood, meaning that you and your actions are not necessarily the cause of it.
5. Don't blame him/her.
Just as tip four mentions that depression can be tied to the childhood, it's not his/her fault for the environment he/she grew up in, nor for the consequences it brought. Depression is a sickness, and sickness comes even though you avoid it, so don't blame the person for being sick.